My heart aches.  I miss Alexander so much.   Mother's Day is tomorrow and it's another sad first I'll have to live through without Alexander.

We buried Alexander yesterday.  Next to saying goodbye to him in the hospital, this is probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life.

Dan and I stopped by his grave today just to check things out and see how the flowers had been placed.  We plan to go back tomorrow to place a Christmas wreath and dig holes to place the pots and arrange the other flowers.

So, Alexander and I had quite a morning yesterday.  He'd been running a fever overnight and around 6:30am, he had a febrile seizure.  It was quite scary for me especially since I was home alone with him.  (Dan had left early that morning for a 6am flight.)  I called 911 and we had great response (3 police officers, 4 paramedics, and the 2 EMTs).  They quickly got us to the hospital and Alexander was treated right away.  Turns out he had a viral infection that we didn't know about.  We thought the fever was related to the mosquito bite he had on his forehead (based on the previous mosquito bite on his face).

All is well now.  The whole thing was definitely harder on me than on Alexander.

Where has all the time gone?  Alexander turned 1 yesterday.  I can't believe it.  This tiny, helpless person we brought home just 12 months ago is now climbing stairs, taking first steps and is becoming an independent little toddler.

Dan has been working the past couple of weeks with Alexander on coming down the stairs and he's finally mastered it.  Alexander is going up and down with confidence.

Dan (unhappily) started installing gates over the weekend.  In addition to Alexander, we were going to watch the son of friends who's just a few months older than Alexander.  He's walking and climbing stairs easily so we thought what better time to get this task done.  I mentinoed to Alexander that his friend was coming for a visit and the next thing I know he's (Alexander) climbing the stairs.  He's only fallen once (from a first step).  Now, we have to teach him how to safely descend the stairs.